I never come to the IACAA conference without going home changed. This year will be no exception. Yesterday, I spent most of the day with a remarkable lady named Donna Beegle. She truly has a wonderful story of getting out of generational poverty, this is probably the hardest type of poverty to ever escape from and I have to admit, when I look at our clients, they are the ones I normally think are least likely to make it out of the system. There are several different kinds of poverty, the two most common are situational and generational. Situational is where something dramatic has happened to change the dynamic of the family and or person. These are the homeless people you see who say, "I had it all and now it's just gone". These people, eventhough it's a struggle, still have a lot of the right connections to pull themselves back out of their situation.
Generational poverty is one people normally write off. They are the ones that seem to be the target of the most judgement and the least understanding. These are the people who people just think will "never change" or dont even want to. That's not quite the case, however, their outlooks can be very different that what yours are. Most of the time, we have goals and dreams of what we want to be doing in a year, in five years, or even at retirement. People in generational poverty just try to make it through the day. One of the biggest things I have changed about my thinking this week is the judgement perspective. Of course, I had an article about this woman with me last Saturday and had Robert read it. He saw the EXACT same thing glaring at him.
We have all known people who are living in poverty and when you do something to help them, you realize, while going to take them someplace, or bring them something, that they are sitting in their living room watching a bigger tv than you have, or that their kids come to school with brand new Nikes on and you think, "What are they doing?" They should have paid bills with that. The thing is, look around, what does it take to be accepted in America? Don't kid yourself---it's there. Robert claimed for a long time not to worry about what clothes he had--of course, his has always had the right names on them. Saturday, he admitted. This hits the nail on the head, it is down to if you don't have the right cell phone, people wonder what is wrong with you. Robert sometimes goes through this himself because his trucks aren't as fancy as everyone else's. Yes, we could have bought him a nicer truck, but hmmm..... he has not one but TWO trucks and they are paid for. Most of his friends have car payments, he doesn't and he is going to be a mechanic so he knows what needs done when they need worked on--most of the time it is a no-brainer, but there are days he still gets ribbed over his old trucks.
Remember, people in generational poverty don't normally look past tomorrow and today, they have the money to go to Rent-to-Own and get a tv and so this is the day they might be happy and accepted.
It also is not as simple as getting a job. A minumum wage job is not going to get anyone out of poverty--and quite frankly, neither is a welfare check, or drawing disablity. Donna said yesterday, there are only two ways to get out of poverty. 1) Get an education, 2) get a skill. Until you start on one of those journeys, you are going to be stuck.
She also pointed out something that I had thought for years.We have all been told all our lives: If you work hard, you will get ahead. Fact is, if you work hard and you have no education, you will NOT get ahead, you will just keep being expected to work hard. Most unskilled laborors get less than a $2.00 raise over the first ten years they work--that's total, and you think about it, that would be a twenty cent raise a year--with little hope of moving up into a better position, because those positions go to the educated.
Once again, I am coming home with some new ideas and some new perspectives. I have one little quick note to all my friends out there who deal with children. Take pictures. Those in generational poverty believe things like school pictures, are something they can live without (basically because it is something that the other kids might easily overlook when the teachers are handing out the pictures). There are several school districts now that are working on programs to make sure every kid has a basic package of school pictures. Why? Donna says she doesn't have a clue what she looked liked as a child, part of that tells her she really doesn't have a history. It IS something that doesn't sound important but down the road--it is. So, when you have an opportunity to snap a few pictures of your kids, your AWANA clubbers, your Sunday School kids, do it, and give them a copy, but save one for them for years down the road too.
Yes, it's a small thing, but it is something you can do.
Happy Tuesday.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Thursday, May 12, 2011
The verdict
Met one of my two new specialists Tuesday. This guy's name is Paul Houk and he is the Physician's Assistant to Dr. William Peterson (If you are a CSI fan, you will recognize the name, although Grissom's real name is "Petersen")--anyway, I caught it the first time I heard it--geek that I am.
Paul was in the office with me for an hour. We talked, extensively, about what I had been through, the stress levels in my life, the likeliness of anything stress wise changing (that would be a NO because I LOVE my life the way it is). His wife has this too, so he has first hand knowledge as well as the book knowledge. Becky had taken all the blood tests except the one that showed what degree of inflammation/ infection was going on in my bowels. Well, he just called. Normal is .3-.6. My tests came back 3.3--not a huge shock, we knew things we not good right now although they are better than they were. He said as long as I am not having signs of a flare to keep taking my prednisone and keep my appointment for the 20th.
I am very, very happy with Paul. I meet Dr. Peterson on the 20th, hope to be as happy with him. I finally feel like we have some direction and I confirmed some fears that I was having. My aunt had colon cancer and my mom had a cousin with UC that turned to colon cancer. Not to mention that Mom has had a lot of her own bowels removed because of adhesions. Not the same, but still bowel problems nonetheless. We need to keep me from having flares if at all possible. Every flare increases the risk of the cancer. Paul told me though, if I think I am going to be going through something overly stressful, like an unbelievable deadline, which happens a lot, to call him and we would start some preventive measures. I like that and feel like that too, is a step in the right direction.
Right now, I am battling a stupid cough. Don't know where it is coming from. Last Saturday, my throat hurt, really bad, but it quit hurting by Sunday and by Monday I was doing the coughing thing. It was so bad yesterday I thought I would cough up a lung. I slept in the recliner last night, because it gets worse when I lay down. I am taking Tylenol Cough and Cold because I am afraid to take anything other than Tylenol based OTC's with the UC.
I have a crazy 10 days, gotta whip this. The UC is doing so well, I am just really aggravated that I am being pulled down by what is apparently a cold. Hopefully nursing myself back to health today will do the trick.
Paul was in the office with me for an hour. We talked, extensively, about what I had been through, the stress levels in my life, the likeliness of anything stress wise changing (that would be a NO because I LOVE my life the way it is). His wife has this too, so he has first hand knowledge as well as the book knowledge. Becky had taken all the blood tests except the one that showed what degree of inflammation/ infection was going on in my bowels. Well, he just called. Normal is .3-.6. My tests came back 3.3--not a huge shock, we knew things we not good right now although they are better than they were. He said as long as I am not having signs of a flare to keep taking my prednisone and keep my appointment for the 20th.
I am very, very happy with Paul. I meet Dr. Peterson on the 20th, hope to be as happy with him. I finally feel like we have some direction and I confirmed some fears that I was having. My aunt had colon cancer and my mom had a cousin with UC that turned to colon cancer. Not to mention that Mom has had a lot of her own bowels removed because of adhesions. Not the same, but still bowel problems nonetheless. We need to keep me from having flares if at all possible. Every flare increases the risk of the cancer. Paul told me though, if I think I am going to be going through something overly stressful, like an unbelievable deadline, which happens a lot, to call him and we would start some preventive measures. I like that and feel like that too, is a step in the right direction.
Right now, I am battling a stupid cough. Don't know where it is coming from. Last Saturday, my throat hurt, really bad, but it quit hurting by Sunday and by Monday I was doing the coughing thing. It was so bad yesterday I thought I would cough up a lung. I slept in the recliner last night, because it gets worse when I lay down. I am taking Tylenol Cough and Cold because I am afraid to take anything other than Tylenol based OTC's with the UC.
I have a crazy 10 days, gotta whip this. The UC is doing so well, I am just really aggravated that I am being pulled down by what is apparently a cold. Hopefully nursing myself back to health today will do the trick.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Short lived
Today I
- Worked on my bosses computer and meanwhile accidently deleted almost 3,000 of her saved emails.
- Got the emails back with a free utility tool.
- Couldn't actually export them unless I paid $40.00
- Paid $40.00
- Got the emails to export but the files they were sorted into were (and still are) gone
- Now have 3,000 (almost) emails that the only way you can tell what they are is to open them.
- Then, after calling my boss and fessing up, went back to my own office to another email
- This email told how many ways a spreadsheet I sent to the state this morning was wrong.
Diary of Superwoman
Love it when a plan comes together--- and when for just a few minutes, I can at least FEEL like I have it all together, all together.
Yesterday turned out to be one of those days, one of those, "Yes, you can have it all" days.
I read a disturbing chick-lit book not too long ago that was telling the heroine that there was Work, Love, and Family--Choose 2 but that to try to have all 3 would cause you to fail miserably at all. Well, of course, the heroine proved her mentor wrong. I have to admit there are days I worry that somebody is getting shortchanged. Here lately, the only thing I can guarantee is that it isn't work. I am so fortunate though to have a son and husband who both step in and pick up the slack because they are part of this family too, not because "Mom's not doing her job".
Anyway.......Wednesday night, four of us left for Rend Lake for a meeting yesterday. Our meetings were scheduled for 8:30-5:30. Our Ladies Tea (aka the "Mother-Daughter" banquet) started at 6. I had pretty well tried to warm Mom there was no way. I had been asked if I could "get out of" the training ( not by Mom). Well, no, I was one of the speakers so that was a little impossible.
When we took a break for lunch yesterday, we were already ahead of schedule, then nobody wanted to take a full hour, making us MORE ahead of schedule. At 2:00, we were on our last slide. There was a little glimmer that I was going to make this happen.
Two of the girls had gotten out of their meetings at Noon, they were waiting on Brenda and me. I really figured they had drove to Mt. Vernon, and we would have to wait a little bit for them to come pick us up. I texted Sharon that we were ready, she texted me that they were sitting in the parking lot. Yeah! I had said the night before that if we got out in time, I would love to get home for this. We got in the car and never stopped, pulling in the drive at the office at 4.
I had called Robert right after school and texted him a grocery list. He ran to the store for me and was pulling in the drive with my groceries as I was pulling in from work. So the next hour went a little like this:
I got to the kitchen, pulled out a bread tube, opened the refrigerated Italian loaf (it was supposed to be French bread, but being out Robert improvised--GOOD THINKING!). Sprayed the tube, popped it in and stuck it in the oven.
Ran to the computer and printed off the recipe for my Parmesan bites, because I never remember to make a recipe for them. Meanwhile, the Italian loaf exploded in the oven because there was too much bread. Took a knife, cut the ends off the bread, put the lids back on, came back to get the paper out of the printer.
Had Robert clear a path up the attic stairs because I realized my dress was up there--yes, the stairs serve as storage---one of these days, that part of my life will be a bit better organized...ANYWAY, while he was doing that, I was mixing cream cheese and Parmesan.
I ran upstairs, found my dress, which just had to be UNDER the clothes bar that fell last fall--at least it wasn't wrinkled.
Came back down, opened the crescent dough, rolled the Parmesan logs, cut up a red pepper, sprinkled on top, rolled the crescents around them, cut them into pieces and got them on a baking tray.
THEN, I ran to the bedroom, changed into my skirt and blouse, came back to the kitchen, took the bread out of the oven, popped it out of the tube and into the freezer. Stuck the Parmesan bites in the oven, and cut up my cucumber.
Meanwhile, I sent Robert on a search of the bottom of my closet for my shoes. I sliced the bread, cut the cucumbers with a little scalloped cutter, put onion dip on the bread, then the cucumbers, sprinkled everything with some basil and wrapped them, took the bites out of the oven, put them on a tray, wrapped them. Went to touch up my makeup and realized all my makeup was still in the back of the van--so I survived with some lipstick and combing my hair. Ran through the house saying "Yes, I AM Superwoman!" slipped my shoes on, grabbed the other purse to go with my outfit, put on my jacket, and out the door I went--approximately an hour after I got home!
Changed out my purse sitting in road construction and made it to the banquet at 10 til 6.
Yes, days like that just make me feel good. The banquet was wonderful, Barb Mulvey was our speaker and she was hilarious. We had a wonderful, wonderful time and I am just very thankful to God for letting me live this wonderful, crazy life.
Yesterday turned out to be one of those days, one of those, "Yes, you can have it all" days.
I read a disturbing chick-lit book not too long ago that was telling the heroine that there was Work, Love, and Family--Choose 2 but that to try to have all 3 would cause you to fail miserably at all. Well, of course, the heroine proved her mentor wrong. I have to admit there are days I worry that somebody is getting shortchanged. Here lately, the only thing I can guarantee is that it isn't work. I am so fortunate though to have a son and husband who both step in and pick up the slack because they are part of this family too, not because "Mom's not doing her job".
Anyway.......Wednesday night, four of us left for Rend Lake for a meeting yesterday. Our meetings were scheduled for 8:30-5:30. Our Ladies Tea (aka the "Mother-Daughter" banquet) started at 6. I had pretty well tried to warm Mom there was no way. I had been asked if I could "get out of" the training ( not by Mom). Well, no, I was one of the speakers so that was a little impossible.
When we took a break for lunch yesterday, we were already ahead of schedule, then nobody wanted to take a full hour, making us MORE ahead of schedule. At 2:00, we were on our last slide. There was a little glimmer that I was going to make this happen.
Two of the girls had gotten out of their meetings at Noon, they were waiting on Brenda and me. I really figured they had drove to Mt. Vernon, and we would have to wait a little bit for them to come pick us up. I texted Sharon that we were ready, she texted me that they were sitting in the parking lot. Yeah! I had said the night before that if we got out in time, I would love to get home for this. We got in the car and never stopped, pulling in the drive at the office at 4.
I had called Robert right after school and texted him a grocery list. He ran to the store for me and was pulling in the drive with my groceries as I was pulling in from work. So the next hour went a little like this:
I got to the kitchen, pulled out a bread tube, opened the refrigerated Italian loaf (it was supposed to be French bread, but being out Robert improvised--GOOD THINKING!). Sprayed the tube, popped it in and stuck it in the oven.
Ran to the computer and printed off the recipe for my Parmesan bites, because I never remember to make a recipe for them. Meanwhile, the Italian loaf exploded in the oven because there was too much bread. Took a knife, cut the ends off the bread, put the lids back on, came back to get the paper out of the printer.
Had Robert clear a path up the attic stairs because I realized my dress was up there--yes, the stairs serve as storage---one of these days, that part of my life will be a bit better organized...ANYWAY, while he was doing that, I was mixing cream cheese and Parmesan.
I ran upstairs, found my dress, which just had to be UNDER the clothes bar that fell last fall--at least it wasn't wrinkled.
Came back down, opened the crescent dough, rolled the Parmesan logs, cut up a red pepper, sprinkled on top, rolled the crescents around them, cut them into pieces and got them on a baking tray.
THEN, I ran to the bedroom, changed into my skirt and blouse, came back to the kitchen, took the bread out of the oven, popped it out of the tube and into the freezer. Stuck the Parmesan bites in the oven, and cut up my cucumber.
Meanwhile, I sent Robert on a search of the bottom of my closet for my shoes. I sliced the bread, cut the cucumbers with a little scalloped cutter, put onion dip on the bread, then the cucumbers, sprinkled everything with some basil and wrapped them, took the bites out of the oven, put them on a tray, wrapped them. Went to touch up my makeup and realized all my makeup was still in the back of the van--so I survived with some lipstick and combing my hair. Ran through the house saying "Yes, I AM Superwoman!" slipped my shoes on, grabbed the other purse to go with my outfit, put on my jacket, and out the door I went--approximately an hour after I got home!
Changed out my purse sitting in road construction and made it to the banquet at 10 til 6.
Yes, days like that just make me feel good. The banquet was wonderful, Barb Mulvey was our speaker and she was hilarious. We had a wonderful, wonderful time and I am just very thankful to God for letting me live this wonderful, crazy life.
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
On the Road Again
Off to Rend Lake this afternoon for a PIPP training. I am one of the presenters in the morning. Scary and exciting all at once. There are a couple of people that could eat me for lunch if they want to--people who have been with their agencies longer and are skeptical to new things most of the time.....I just pray I say the right things.
Stopped by Becky's office and begged for more prednisone. I have been feeling SO GOOD but the day I went to one prednisone there were little signs that I was going to have problems. She gave me 10 more days. I really needed about 23--to get me through Graduation but she said 10 will have to do and hopefully I can make it to St. Louis to see the specialist soon.
Better get, time to make the donuts.
M
Stopped by Becky's office and begged for more prednisone. I have been feeling SO GOOD but the day I went to one prednisone there were little signs that I was going to have problems. She gave me 10 more days. I really needed about 23--to get me through Graduation but she said 10 will have to do and hopefully I can make it to St. Louis to see the specialist soon.
Better get, time to make the donuts.
M
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